Not so long ago, a couple in love choosing to elope meant romantic escapes in the night to cement their love and run away to be happy. It began from Shakespearean dramas and old-fashioned fairy-tales, where a couple’s love was against the odds, unapproved and in the face of adversity. Couples that eloped did so to secure their love and prove that they wanted nothing more in their lives than each other. Nowadays, most love stories aren’t as dramatic or heroic as they were back then, so the idea of marriage elopement has gathered itself a few new meanings and pre-conceived notions. For one, a lot of people associate elopement with a rather off-beat, laidback couple. It’s thought that many couples who elope are either too laid back and carefree to organise a big wedding or are choosing to run away from the stress of catering for their loved ones.
However, every couple will have their own reasons for choosing to elope, many of them well thought out and deliberated over before the actual day arrives. It can be a case of simply not being able to afford a huge wedding, and preferring to spend their money on an intimate day for two instead. For others, the people getting married may have already been down the aisle before, and would prefer a much more low key, simple affair their second time around. The fact that a couple gets married just between themselves does not diminish the occasion. An elopement, when done well, can be a truly romantic and special day for the newlyweds.
Of course, you will have to commit a little more to this style of wedding other than just booking a flight out of the country. There are lot of factors that you will need to consider and preparations that need to be made. Very briefly, we have composed a short list of what you need to do before you elope.
Inform family members:
In most cases, your parents and siblings are a huge part of your lives already, so it’s no surprise that they are going to expect to be a part of your special day. The biggest task at hand here is to convey to your parents all the right reasons why you want to elope with your fiancé, and to assure them that it is no reflection on them. The worst thing you can do is not notify your family and close ones that you plan to elope, only to have them find out afterwards with feelings of hurt and betrayal. Allow your family and loved ones to feel involved in your day in some small way, even if it’s just being let in on the secret. Sit down with them and explain that this is what you want as a couple, and that you plan on showing them all the pictures and sharing the stories of the day right away with them when you get back. That way, it will avoid hurting your loved ones and may even lead to a little celebration to see you guys off, who knows.
Gather all legal documentation:
You will need to firstly purchase a wedding licence. You will also both need an original copy of your birth certificate. If you are travelling outside the country, make sure you have all your passports, boarding passes and other travel documents secured together. Research the requirements needed for the ceremony, which will usually differ for each country. Book the appointment for a time that’s suitable, and check to see if they may need you to fill out certain legal forms or in some cases, they may even need bloodwork. Once you have the ceremony booked and the supporting documents, you’re on your way to becoming bride and groom.
Choose your location:
This is where the fun begins. You can choose to wed wherever you want, that’s the joy in eloping. It can be an exotic beach getaway that conveniently launches into a honeymoon. It can be an urban retreat to New York to squeeze in a little sightseeing while you’re there. You can elope in Paris, and enjoy the lifestyle and romance of the city while you say the “I dos”. You can even decide to get married in your own city, and have a countryside retreat with just some peace and quiet and the two of you. No matter which destination you two decide on, as long as it suits both your needs and hopes then it will be romantic and special.
Plan your day:
This will include many of the similar planning aspects involved in a big, traditional wedding, only on a much smaller scale. Book your flights, book a nice hotel and pick out a few of the local landmarks that you think will be great to visit or snap your newlywed pictures at. This is another option that many couples who elope still opt for – a private photographer. This is one thing that all couples who have eloped would agree that you need above all else. Due to the fact that it’s just you two on the day, you want to have something tangible to bring back and prove to family, friends and even future children that you two had a romantic elopement. Many photographers will gladly come along with you on your day and document the entire process, from the civil registry to your dinner to a handheld walk in the street.
You can also go ahead and choose exactly what outfits and dress you want to wear without having to cater for other bridesmaids or groomsmen. Choose a dress that you want to wear, not one that you feel you should wear. You can decide to include a spontaneously bought bouquet of flowers that were locally sourced too, as something to keep as a memento. Make sure to arrange transportation that will suit your needs on the day. It may not have to be the rented Rolls-Royce that the father-in-law wanted, it can even be the public transport system if you want – as long as it gets you from each destination and makes you happy. Afterward, the two of you can go to whichever restaurant or bar or both that appeals most. You can have as much fun as you want on this day, so go to the places that you want to see and experience, be it a Michelin star restaurant or a downtown pizza place.
Prepare the announcement:
After your elopement and perfect, romance-filled honeymoon – if you have decided to take that extra time – you will need to carefully time the aftermath of your wedding. A lot of people might have very strong reactions to the fact you chose to elope, both good and bad. A lot more people outside your immediate family are also going to think that they were entitled to some sort of preference above others when it comes to the: “So how did you find out?,” question. Ring friends and family to tell them the good news once you arrive home and have settled in. Show your parents the photos and tell them how every moment felt. After the most important people are taken care of, you can then decide to go down the traditional route of sending out your announcement cards with simply the date, venue and time you got married. Alternatively, you can simply time a Facebook post to let both of your circles know that you are now officially married and wait for the congratulations to roll in.
For some inspiration, take a look here at Mairead and Phil’s elopement, who flew from Ireland to get married in New York City at Central Park in a small intimate wedding with just the two of them.
- Roisin Curran
Image Credits: Bride on bike: Chic Vintage Brides | Courthouse couple: A Practical Wedding | Eiffel Tower couple: Wedding Chicks | City Hall couple: Percy Handmade | Couple in cave: Junebug Weddings | Times Square couple: Style Me Pretty | Elopement announcement: Intimate Weddings