If he's finally popped the question, then it's time to celebrate! Pop the bubbly, bask and enjoy the first moments of being engaged. But before you dive into announcements and wedding plans, there are a few things we would advise you not to do.
Don't put it on Facebook first
Of course you'll want to shout it from the heavens and let the whole world know that you're getting married and Facebook is probably the fastest way to let everyone know, but it's definitely not the first thing you should do. Make sure you stay away from all social media until you call your parents. After that you should call your siblings and tell your closest friends in person. Think about who you would expect to hear from face to face if the tables were turned. There's no rush on the Facebook community knowing after all. Once you've personally notified all the important people in your life, feel free to make the social media announcement and let the rest of the congratulations roll in.
Don't 'save the date' straight away
We know how tempting it can be, especially if you have a particular date in mind, but don't lose the run of yourselves. First you need to find a venue, which could easily have you compromising on your the date of your wedding. It's easier to wait until you have a few details locked down so that you know your when wedding date will be. If you want to tell people something, narrow it down to a possible season but don't do any more than that until you're sure.
Don't start house-hunting
Trust us, you don't need the stress. Most doctors, psychologists and life coaches will tell you that overloading your life with too much change will cause serious stress. If you can avoid more than one life altering change at a time then do it. Moving house, changing jobs, getting married and having children are the most stressful times in people's lives so it's not a good idea to double up on stress necessarily; one thing at a time.
Don't get a pet
For similar reasons, it's not advisable to get a dog or a cat or anything that's going to require extra time, care or maintenance. You will have enough stress and plenty of wedding planning that will take up your spare time without having to worry about fitting something new into your life that you need to adapt to. Not to mention the extra money that will go into a new pet, which isn't something you need to be spending too much of coming up to the wedding, which brings us to our next point.
Don't splurge on a big holiday
If you're saving, it can be tempting to go a big splurge holiday with the girls or even a pre-wedding holiday with your groom-to-be. It's better to keep saving towards your wedding and afterwards rather than blow it on a holiday or another big expense that you weren't plan on spending money on anyway.
Don't keep looking at Pinterest
We love Pinterest! It's an essential part of wedding planning, along with S&P Weddings and plenty of other inspiration sources. However, once you have settled on certain elements, stop looking at those Pinterest boards. Don't keep looking at different types of centrepieces once you've picked yours. Stop looking at bouquets when you've ordered your own. It's a nightmare to keep changing your mind about what style you want and you'll probably never settle as long as you keep looking at new inspiration.
Don't tell everyone your plans
It can be tempting to start telling all your friends what colour bridesmaid dresses you've gone with or what decorations you're using for the ceremony. This gets even tougher when the whole world asks you what your plans are, what colours you're having and how many guests you're having. Resist talking about your wedding too much. For a start, you don't know how you're plans will change. You also don't know who will make the cut and who won't before you finalise the guest list. To save embarrassment, it's better to avoid talking too much about your wedding plans to colleagues and acquaintances in case they then expect an invite that they won't be getting.
Don't ask your bridesmaids without thinking
You're probably thinking this won't happen to you but just picture the scene: you've invited your four closest girlfriends out to tell them the good news in person. You show them your stunning new sparkler, screams of excitement all around, the bubbly is ordered, and suddenly you're shouting "Will you all be my bridesmaids?" Suddenly, you can't take it back, and you've realised that you don't want four bridesmaids, and you also forgot that you haven't asked your sister yet. Not to mention, on further reflection, one of your friends isn't the most reliable when it comes to organising things. Hold back asking anyone until you've actually sat down and decided how many bridesmaids and who you want to ask.
Don't put off the little things
It can be tempting when there are much more exciting things to decide on about your wedding. Who cares about insurance when you have to choose your wedding dress? However, it's the little things that are often the most important. Get your the legal documents sorted as soon as possible, get your engagement ring insured, make sure your passports are well in date for your honeymoon, etc. These little things are essential, particularly your marriage licence and they can be done almost before anything else, so why wait?
Don't brag about being engaged
Be considerate to your friends. Of course everyone's really excited about your engagement, but that doesn't mean they need to hear about it all the time. You don't want to be that person that your friends don't talk to as much because all you go on about is your engagement. Be particularly cautious not to brag about details as well. It's unbecoming to brag anyway, but friends will find it particularly difficult to have a normal conversation with you if all you do is talk about how much money you're spending, how big your ring is and how much your dress will cost.
- Jenny Darmody
Image credits: Bench: Marianne Wilson Photography via Green Wedding Shoes | Dog: Pinterest | Shadows: Angie Schoenherr via Elizabeth Anne Designs | Bridesmaids: Sam Hurd Photography